I am a sail boat
You are an anchor
I am designed to sail
You held me back
I am a bird
You are a cage
I was made to fly
You kept me locked up tight
I am a runner
You are a gun
Once you rang loud and clear
I was gone
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This was a poem I recently wrote about a brief relationship I was in. He seemed very interested in me, but our lives were going in very different directions. I have a passion for traveling and a desire to live in another country. He, however, had no intention of leaving the state let alone the country. For awhile I told myself that things will just work out, some how. I was afraid that if this relationship didn't work there may never be another guy who likes me. I was wrong, and I know that now. But at the time it was a big fear of mine. I thought that maybe if he got a glimpse at what it is like to travel and visit other countries he would fall in love with it like I have.
That however was not the case. He told me that we could travel for a year or so, but then come back to America and just live here. To him it was a great idea, a perfect compromise. But to me, it was an awful idea. I felt trapped, held back from everything I wanted in life. But I didn't say anything. I was still hoping that things would work out.
He finally cut things off with me because he saw himself having a future with another girl and not me. Practically his exact words, through text. Real classy, I know. Besides the immediate sadness that comes with any breakup, I felt a rush of relief. I was free. I didn't have to worry about being held back from what I am truly passionate about and what I feel is my calling in life.
There are many times when I wish this dumb little relationship didn't even happen. But looking back I realize I have learned so much from this:
- I shouldn't hold onto something that is dead. This relationship was destined to fail from day one and I knew that. But I held onto it hoping that something would change.
- Don't let people hold you back from doing what you are passionate about. Don't compromise all of your happiness for someone else.
- There are so many other fish in the sea. Don't get hung up if the first one or even the first hundred aren't the right one. You do you and eventually you will look over and see someone doing them. And it just so happens that you are swimming in the same direction. Yay for confusing fish and youth group analogies..
Love Always,
xo Noelle
